Words For Someone Else

Pretend.  Avoid.  Ignore.
It enrages, incenses and saddens me
Stop the world.  I want to get off.
 
Pretend.  Avoid.  Ignore.
These are all the ways we lose ourselves
These are the reasons we run
We hide
We lie to ourselves
To others
 
Pretend.  Avoid.  Ignore.
This is why we don’t believe in ourselves
This is why confidence has failed us
This is why we all search
For meaning
For validation
 
Outside of ourselves
 
The answers lie within
If only we would listen
If only we would rise
If only we would try
If only we would find
Our voice and value
From within
 
We are all capable
We are all powerful
And this…
We forget the power we have
And we give it up to others
Far too often
Far too easily
 
Because of the struggles
And sufferings
And hurts
And unresolved pains
Everyone is carrying
 
 
 
To the point of overwhelm
Going through expected motions
To be good enough
 
Pretend.  Avoid.  Ignore
 
See me
Hear me
Accept me
Like me
Love me
Validate me
 
Stop.  Just stop.
 
Damn the boxes
None of us want to fit in
But are forced to be placed in
Off with the masks
Of pretend, avoid, ignore
We wear
 
To hell with the platitudes
Of incessant fakeness and positivity
Love and light
Thoughts and prayers
The human condition
And reality
 
This only serves to feed
In feast or in famine
Never satiated
 
Pretend.  Avoid.  Ignore
 
Stop.  Just stop.
 
Take a breath
Take some time
See things as they are
Stand strong in your knowing
Be firm in the unknowing
Venture forth and on
 
Embrace your rebel,
Bah, bah blacksheep…
Rise up.  Revolt
Be different
Stand apart
And stand out
Be badass
Just as you are
 
Show up.
Be seen.
Be heard.
 
A little or
A lot
Wiser
 
To all the lessons that
Have shaken
And grown
And groomed me
Not right
Not wrong
 
Hard
Desperate
Challenged
 
In pieces
Shredded
Naked
 
Lost
Broken
Shattered
 
No more misguided
No longer misdirected
No longer creating
My own madness
I banish out
Pretend, avoid, ignore
 
I prefer to birth my wild
 
Wild to me is held tight in reigns
It loosens in moments
In situations
With people
In traps
In abandon
No inhibition
 
My wild eases and soothes
It is my comfort
It is my rebel
It cradles me
And explodes around me
 
My wild is careful
And cautious
Hidden and secretive
Bared only for a select few
Yet it sneaks out
And slithers about
It gets me in trouble
For it will not be caught
 
My wild is loud
It is proud
It seeps and seethes
It whispers softly
Then screams at me in defiance
 
My wild is the daggers in my eyes
The thunder in my feet
The fuck you that cannot,
Will not be concealed on my face
It vibrates throughout my body
Down with these walls that imprison me
 
My wild is quiet and withheld
Released and un-caged
It booms and pounds
And settles to a hum
Then hammers me like a drum
 
My wild is raw
And true and real
Shrouded in nicety
It is coveted and safe
Tucked away neatly
Then unknowingly unleashed
 
My wild is embodied in me
You will see me
You will hear me
You will fear me
You will respect me
Shhhh….not so loud
Step back in the shadows
 
My wild is my mind
My wild is my being
My wild is my voice
My wild is my heart
My wild is my soul
Buried deep within and among
These bones
 
My wild is…all of me
A cocoon
A web
 
Exposed in my authenticity
 
Just me
 
Released
Unapologetic
Honest
True
Real
No fucks to give
 
There is no allowance
You are not welcome
Here
Pretend
Avoid
Ignore
 
The time has come
To let your wild
Roar

©2018 Angela Felzmann

Angela Felzmann is a helping professional by day; heavy metal rocker chick when free from social compliance, and trying to be as authentic and true and genuine as any situation allows.

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