It is not what I was expecting, and everything I expected, should it happen, For three years plus I’ve managed to steer clear. I followed precautions, I did what I thought needed to be done, and it still happened. At first it felt like a strong cold; swift and unexpected, and far too early for the flu. The symptoms, the cough, the headache and chills, had me doubting but was it 12 or 24 hours into it I was sure. COVID-19 hit me hard. The fatigue, brain fog, delusional sleep, cough, congestion and headache; my body felt brittle. I couldn’t get up; I didn’t feel like moving and was pretty sure I couldn’t. Then, there was the lack of taste, lack of appetite, total lack of motivation. A simple at-home test confirmed the reality I had been living with for much longer than I expected. For months now health officials have been cautioning against the latest strain. Over these past years I’ve masked up, washed and regularly sanitized my hands. I’ve been vaccinated with regular booster shoots as recommended, as available. Actually, I was expecting I would receive my next shot next month, the latest in a series of boosters that would protect me from this ugly virus. Still it happened. COVID-19 is still, very much, a reality. I wasn’t able to do the things I usually do. I didn’t feel much like doing anything. Today might be the first day I’ve really felt like doing something. It’s an improvement I can only hope will keep me moving forward.
Embracing reminders of who we were, not who we are not, we remain convinced of this confusion and seldom make the right assumption in moments where we wish to define ourselves. We will need any sort of control over any areas of a life that is primarily accessible to all. What we share, when we share, occasionally goes beyond intimacy expected in the moment. Caution, isolated thought amongst the many you are thinking or have thought; why or why not. We need to breathe for our self, even mere mouthfuls of tainted air can absolve you of the guilt, even temporarily. Little freedom. This cruel reality is replacing the ordinary.
Final details, a finishing touch, depending on how you look at it.
