by Melina Paris

I did not plan to drive my son to school today. He is supposed to get up in time to catch the bus, at 7 a.m. Why kids need to get up so early is another subject. They need more rest. When I pulled over to let him get out, he made a comment that I do not exactly remember. But the message hit me.

My son is overwhelmed.

He is 14, in 9th grade, and dealing with everything that adolescents have to. Right now he has to determine what classes he will take next year and he’s getting some advice from older friends. He’s anxious and wants to get this all done. He mentioned summer school, online classes and online Drivers Ed. I joked with him, that last class is only online until you have to hit the road. In addition, he is trying to recover from a stubborn cold. We are in unusually low temperatures, even for winter in Southern California. He is tired much of the time and he sleeps – a lot.

This struck me hard. On top of my son being overwhelmed, right now we are all reeling in this country. I believe our kids are reeling most of all. Last month, on the other side of the United States children, teachers and others we’re gunned down in a massive school shooting.

I don’t need to know more than the shooter had assault weapons and that souls were lost. I see these kids, who were saved from death, not speaking out but SHOUTING out! They have had enough.

As a parent what do we do? Much of our approach for how to discuss this tragedy with our children depends on their age. But the point is to check in. We know this but the rub is, we hear this news and we must carry on. We feel heartbroken, confused, even despair and powerlessness.

I talked to my son a little before he got out of the car. He has struggled to keep up with his work. Recently, he is improving. I rubbed his shoulder and encouraged him to continue.

That thing, the quick drop off, it’s always been awkward for me. I want to tell my son all the wonderful traits I see in him and show him a little extra love. I make whatever attempt I can in seconds, before he’s off running to class. I tell myself, I’ll get back to this when we’re both back home.

Once again I realize the blessing in that.

From this place of confusion and despair, as parents what coping mechanisms do we have? We sit with the gravity of our feelings, the frustration and helplessness. Personally, I had two very rough days around this horrific event. I’m certain every parent did. But how do we cope with these events and give our children the best tools so that they can cope?

And how can we stop this?

It feel’s insurmountable. But it’s not.

I feel I’m not living in the same country I grew up in. When we look back in time, sometimes we look with a fonder shade of reality coloring then is accurate. But I grew up with the certainty that huge wrongs (such as shootings), are corrected. That we as a society protect each other and punish those who would do harm and – here’s the difference- we would fix the underlying problem that initiated such wrong acts because it is the right thing to do.

No. Matter. What.

After I came home, I made a cup of coffee and checked emails. As if the universe responded to my confounded state of helplessness and heartbreak, I saw my daily Morning Prayer email from Guru Singh (third-generation yogi, master spiritual teacher and) author. It spoke of how those in power try to change perceptions. It said we are living in a world dominated by unconsciousness.

Intrigued, I read on.

“In today’s world, dominated by unconsciousness, social psychologists speak of emotional manipulation operating more rampantly than ever before in human history…convincing beliefs that are exactly the opposite from the facts.”

The opposite from the facts. I believe that statistical odds exist. And the odds of arming teachers with guns mean more guns in schools. That equation does not statistically have a good outcome to my mind. Many counter my argument with the idea that a “good person” with a fire arm can protect the innocent from a “bad person” with one. I wonder how they think children will feel knowing their teachers and other adults in their schools possess guns? I wonder how a child can learn in such an environment? I wonder why a child may not think that they too will then need a gun? I wonder about much more than this that I don’t want to get into here.

I heard a news interview with a commander with 30 years on the police force. To paraphrase his opinion on guns in schools, he said, it’s very easy for a bad guy with a gun to get a gun away from a good guy with a gun.

The NRA and the president tell us guns in schools is the answer to this crisis. I call it emotional manipulation; convincing beliefs that are the opposite of facts.

My email went on to say this technique has been practiced in “intelligence” communities for centuries. It’s called perception management or the controlling of power words. And unlimited information sharing in social media culture, creates an increased willingness to accept “statement as fact.”

This is interesting. I understand this as a sort of domino effect. As we navigate through social media and receive unlimited information, our critical processes can become diminished, thus opening increased opportunity to accept “statement as fact.”

I would like to think that’s not the case and I don’t know this to be a fact, on individual bases. I have a enough common sense and education to filter out bogus information. Yet, the question then becomes, does this remain true among masses of people on social media? I’d bet the odds say no.

The message continued, even with the potential negatives of this effect there is a potential positive side.

“The ancient science of bhakti yoga describes the power of miracles contained in the presence of ultra-strong beliefs. Imagine the forces of your beliefs unleashed to their fullest, you are imagining the physical momentum contained in the energy potential of each moment. Manifestation, linked to beliefs. . . the ability to focus perception, to such a degree, that the perception manipulates the perceived.

“This is the language of quantum physics,” Singh wrote.

This is another domino effect. To focus physical senses to the degree that the perception manages your beliefs unleashed to their fullest.

We witness this miracle through our children. They are the defenders who fulfill this positive side, manifestation linked to their beliefs. This is where miracles happen. It is our bond to nurture them and do what is right by our descendants, as they speak the language of quantum physics. We follow their lead and ensure that we do everything possible to stop these senseless tragedies.

Of course we can do more in our adult world. We can vote and stay aware of and choose where we spend or invest money. For instance, it was reported that a growing list of companies are cutting ties with the NRA. We can choose to support those companies who move in this direction.

I found hope. After days of feeling unhinged, a small but powerful prayer message reminded me of the greater potential of humanity at a dark time. We are capable of miracles. We can manifest divine intervention in human affairs. And we can lighten the overwhelming load that we have put on our kids through our unconsciousness.

Though we may live in a world dominated by unconsciousness, these kids are awake.

©2018 Melina Paris

Melina Paris is a mother and writer who covers music, arts and cultural events in Long Beach and the greater Los Angeles area. Her publications and websites include Amass Magazine, Random Lengths News and Palacio Magazine, DTLA-Weekly, The Urban Howl, Tour Worthy and Infinity Artists Group.

by Melody Lima

It is easy to forget.

Forget to love, forget to pause, forget to breathe.

It is difficult to see the beauty, the light or the kindness hidden under the shroud of darkness.

It appears, often, there is nothing but gloom, nothing but aversion, nothing but hatred around us. This is not new. For thousands of years, the world has been filled with war, disagreement, threats, crime, disrespect, prejudice, torture and violence.

And yet, when we are filled with despair, out in the distance appears a glimmer of hope. A ray of the future shines upon us. Gently guiding us forward, onto our path like the loving hand of a parent or a teacher or a mentor. A simple touch to show us one step away from the oppressing cloud.

This small gesture of kindness is tiny, minute and easy to miss. Do not be fooled, gifts come in many sizes. A generous deed is found in the unexpected moments. Love is often ordinary, not panoramic.

Welcome the ordinary. Allow the gesture of compassion to brighten the way. Accept thoughtfulness from the acquaintance whose name you may not remember, but whose acceptance will never leave you.

It is easy to welcome goodness.
It is easy to experience laughter.
It is easy to rejoice in love.

Do not forget to breathe in life.
Never forget to love.

©2018 Melody Lima

Melody Lima is a creative adventurer who will always tell her story somehow, in some way. The narrative is filled with movement (yoga teacher), words (writer), color (artist), texture (parenthood) and other experiences of discovery. Sharing her observations on and off the yoga mat, Melody always attempts to keep things mindful and not too cynical. Her words have appeared through elephant journal, The Tattooed Buddha and The Urban Howl. Read more inspiration from Melody through her website  www.yogamatunrolled.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Day to day, every day, we are accosted by words.

Look around. Everywhere our landscape is dotted with slogans, catch phrases, deals and appeals for our time, attention, and money.

Advertising is everywhere and cannot be avoided. Signs. Everywhere. Words from someone else selling, or telling us, what we need, what to believe, and how or when we can see it.

It goes well past products or prestige, and the message is not always clear, but it clutters any and all vacant space within our sight lines.

You get the message.

There is no escape. You can’t help but see the billboard blocking the sunset, larger-than-life banners flapping on the edge of the high-rise, day-bright neon, or lawns signs at election time emphasizing one bad choice over another.

How do you respond to the words? Do you try the new service, or buy what they are selling? Do you stop and take a further look? The truth always telling.

It is nothing new; I can’t remember when it was. It’s the same ol’, same ol’. Brand names may rotate, or the colour or style shifts in another direction, but with all the changes, it is still the same.

It could be handwritten or professionally crafted, and size does not matter, it speaks in our language. We all use words to communicate. We cannot survive without words. We read words whether we like to are not. They are always there.

Perhaps now it has become even more obvious as it has spread further into our virtual reality. We are constantly bombarded with messages each time you click or swipe on the mobile device to get to the information you want and need, our chosen apps held hostage or interrupted with pop ups.

It is a newer format, yes, but it follows the same old premise. The ads, the signs, telling us what we may or may not want, appealing to your hunger(s), or vices, insecurities, or greed.

We respond.

It works the same way a poster for Kool-Aid will distract you on a hot summer’s day. If you’ve got the thirst, you will likely buy. Sometimes you might be looking to repair something, or the best price on something you don’t really need.

Words: they temp you, they taunt you, they upset you and haunt you. The words catch your eye and, as consumers at heart, we look and we buy.

“Sign, sign, everywhere a sign
Blockin’ out the scenery, breakin’ my mind
Do this, don’t do that, can’t you read the sign?”
                                                      -Les Emerson

by Deb Stidham Avery

My dear, you are a most brave, kind and awesome being.

When your mother threw away the little bunch of wildflowers you picked for her, stating that they were only weeds, it was only because she failed to see their worth.

When others laughed at you, and still do, for your deep love of all beings, it was because they were not capable of seeing the beauty and intelligence in all things.

When your husband belittled and controlled it was because he did not appreciate your true worth, the intricacies of your beautiful mind, or the beauty and depth of your heart.

It’s never about you, my dear. It’s always been about them.

Each time someone says or does something hurtful, remember that.

It is not about you, your intelligence, your worth and your compassionate heart. Instead, it is always about them.

It’s about all the times they were hurt, ridiculed or neglected. It’s about all the past hurts in their lives that caused them to close their hearts and minds. It’s not about you and your openness, your deep empathy and your ability to see all sides of the situation.

Instead of armoring your heart and mind, you chose to open them to the pain and heartaches and the interconnectedness of all that is around you. That, my dear, takes courage, trust, and lots of love and compassion.

Don’t you dare let the words, thoughts and actions of others cause you a moment’s pain. You know better than this. You’ve spent your whole life learning that we all travel through life with different levels of consciousness. And you know that this is just how life works.

It has nothing to do with you, my dear, and everything to do with them; their perceptions and the experiences that have shaped their lives.

Love and forgive them because of what you have learned. They have traveled a different pathway. They have experienced life differently from you.

Now, dry your tears and always remember these two things.

You are a beautiful, intelligent and loving being.

And it’s never about you, dear heart, and always about them.

©2018 Deb Stidham Avery
Deb Stidham Avery lives in a small rural community in the South with her best friend Sam, the dog. She is often found walking in the woodlands, gardening, reading, listening to music and writing. It has been through her writing that she has found healing, hope and grace. She hopes that by sharing her experiences and insights with others, in hopes that they too may find peace, acceptance and help in dealing with the problems and traumas that life can sometimes deal us all. She currently writes for The Tattooed Buddha and has written for Sivana, Wake Magazine and elephant journal.

by Carolyn Riker

I believe
if this were a different lifetime,
we’d be more than passing
as midnight fireflies.
 
I see this in the corner of
your eyes; such smiles rub
my wild and yet your tease
eliminates my needs when
you feel uncomfortable
you reinstate your prestige.
 
We dance over the obvious.
Too shy to say why.
It’s touched a note deep inside
of how often I’m seen
as if invisible.
 
You know it hurts
how much unsaid
is spoken in all the ways
you try to hide
but still, it shows,
I’m just another token.
 
You aren’t the first
but you are the last
because I finally know
my worth is what needs
to be spoken.

©2018 Carolyn Riker

Photography by Abena Buahene

Carolyn (Riker) Avalani is a licensed counselor, teacher, writer and poet. A frequent contributor to numerous online journals and anthologies, her first book of poetry and prose Blue Clouds  was published December 2016.
Between sips of coffee, navigating life with copious writing and daydreaming, Carolyn offers creative writing workshops, coaching and private counseling. To find out more please visit www.carolynriker.com